Quote of the day: "You can't fight ideas with bullets." - Leo Gold

One of the important tools we have that build relationship with people is our eyes.
Eye contact is one of the easiest forms of body language to use, but one of the most complicated to master. High-quality eye contact sends good feelings to others and makes you seem interested , while bad eye contact can make you seem distant and indifferent, and can even offend others.

Here are the most important tips for a powerful eye contact:

• Be confident the more you believe in yourself, the easier you will find to perform eye contact.

• If talking to a group, look ahead and above the crowd. When you build up confidence start looking around but never look at someone too long as it could cause you to muck up.

• Look into the person’s eyes and hold the gaze for a bit longer than is socially comfortable. At that point, you will know that you have made eye contact.

• The best way is not actually to make eye contact but rather look at his/her forehead or hair. It still looks like your making eye contact.

• Do not scan. When you are talking with somebody, you need not engage him or her in a staring contest, but do not be looking around the room while they are talking.

• Mimic the speaker’s level and intensity of eye contact. If you have problems with how much eye contact to give somebody, this is a great trick.

• Be carefull with blinking, both frequency and amplitude. If she (he) blinks more often, this is indicative of anxiety or discomfort: bad sign. If her blinking is slower, it means she is relaxed and at ease, so she is in a good position to be swooned by you.

• Mirror her (his) eyes: pay attention to her eyebrows and mimic the emotions of surprise or sadness (to “feel her pain”) when she describes a story. It works best if accompanied by a little nod at these points of inflection.

• Good eye contact must be complemented by a authentic smile, or else you will just be staring, which makes anyone feel uncomfortable. Now don’t always smile, cause that just makes you look insecure, but smile at the key points.

• Pupil size is very important in eye contact. If they dilate (grow larger), this is a sure-fire sign of attraction. If they pupate (grow smaller), that’s not a good sign.

• Practice! This is only half a tip because it applies to almost anything in life. Eye contact is a tough thing to master, and can be even tougher if you wait until when it counts to practice it.

After eye contact, you can start learning about other areas of body language. There are many things you can learn from people and nearly half of them all come from the eyes.

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