Detecting Lies: 10 Subtle Signs of Lying
It is human nature to lie. Lies are spoken everyday, by the people you see at work, your family and your friends. The following techniques to telling if someone is lying are often used by police, and security experts. This knowledge is also useful for managers, employers, and for anyone to use in everyday situations where telling the truth from a lie can help prevent you from being a victim of fraud/scams and other deceptions.
- A person who is lying to you will avoid making eye contact. If they won’t look you in the eye’s or if they look you in the eye’s while saying “I’m looking you in the eye’s, so I’m not lying.” They are probably lying. They will normally raise their voice, get defensive and will totally want to change the subject. Go with your first gut feeling that feeling is normally right.
- Hands touching their face, throat & mouth. Touching or scratching the nose or behind their ear. Not likely to touch his chest/heart with an open hand.
- The guilty person may speak more than natural, adding unnecessary details to convince you… they are not comfortable with silence or pauses in the conversation.Also, the guilty person use humor or sarcasm to avoid a subject.
- Timing and duration of emotional gestures and emotions are off a normal pace. The display of emotion is delayed, stays longer it would naturally, and then stops suddenly. Timing is off between emotions gestures/expressions and words. Example: Someone says “I love it!” when receiving a gift, and then smile after making that statement, rather then at the same time the statement is made.
- A liar will use your words to make answer a question. When asked, “Did you eat the last cookie?” The liar answers, “No, I did not eat the last cookie.”A statement with a contraction is more likely to be truthful: “ I didn’t do it” instead of “I did not do it”.
- If you believe someone is lying, then change subject of a conversation quickly, a liar follows along willingly and becomes more relaxed. The guilty wants the subject changed; an innocent person may be confused by the sudden change in topics and will want to back to the previous subject.
- Excessive gestures are important body language signs indicating lies. In a subconscious effort to enhance believability, a liar will promote his/her words with unnaturally pronounced gesturing. Also on a subconscious level, the body language serves to divert attention from the dishonest words and face.
- Shifting from foot to foot is often the body language of a liar. Similarly, a liar doesn’t always keep his/her feet flat on the ground (whether standing or sitting). This body language generally falls under signs of the “flight instinct” category, which stems from fear or discomfort–both emotions that are triggered by telling lies.
- A liar frequently mumbles or speaks in a lowered, monotonous tone, especially at the exact time lies are being uttered. Such modulations in speech are primarily signs that either the liar lacks confidence that the lies are believable, or that the liar feels guilty about telling the lies. From a body language standpoint, these signs are often accompanied by a lowered head and slouching shoulders.
- Justification – Attempting to justify every detail with lengthy explanations . Also, the lies uses (and particularly overuses) language like “honestly,” “believe me,” “to tell the truth,” etc. S/he is almost certainly being deceptive.
Life would be far easier for some people if there were a foolproof method for spotting lies. However, whatever method we use there is always the possibility that our assumptions or estimations will be incorrect. Clearly, it would be far easier still if people simply didn’t lie in the first place. But then how would you keep children from learning the truth about Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy?