4 Keys of the Charisma
Please become itself charismatic? Please be admired to you, respected, be listened, appreciated, like are people who have charisma? Follow the guide, and discover the 4 keys of the charisma.
The charisma, it is one of these concepts that it is difficult to define with words, but which one undoubtedly recognition when it is seen. Here the definition of the charisma by the dictionary:
Charisma, (Greek): A special divine gift which endows the recipient with a supernatural ability to know and proclaim the will of God. In short, a pipeline from God which mere mortals may not challenge.
Of this definition, I will retain mainly three things:
Aura: it is this small more, one indefinable but perceptible mixture which makes that the person is charismatic.
Able to cause adhesion: Charismatic people are those which one seeks the company, and which one has desire for following.
People: The charisma is a social competence by definition. You cannot be charismatic if you live on a deserted island.
To help you in your research, here 4 principal qualities, in my opinion, that it will be necessary for you to develop:
1. Develop your interior force
All charismatic people that I met showed this characteristic: a strong personality. That does not mean that it were choleric, obstinate, after everyone. That means that their limits were well defined, that they knew what they wanted and where they went, and which one could always with what expect with them.
If you are charismatic, you have firm opinions, because you reflected there lengthily, and are ready to defend them because you are convinced that they are worth the sorrow of it. That does not mean that you never change opinion by principle, but which you do not adopt an idea without y to have thought front. You have strong principles, which you follow in all circumstances.
You know what is right and what is not it, you know your limits, which you are ready to make or not to make, and it is consequently difficult to make you change opinion.
You can not say when it is needed, without your interlocutor. As you do not doubt you, you do not feel the need to protect your small clean love at all costs. Consequently, you neither are limited neither obstinate, you are not either afraid to change opinion if you note that you are in the error, nor to acknowledge your small imperfections. You accept criticisms and do not be afraid to call you in question. Your interior coherence enables you to act in accordance with your principles and with your values. You are not afraid to endanger to you to obtain what you wish, because you rely on your faculty to fall down on your legs. You thus live peacefully in the certainty to be in the right way. You act in accordance with your thoughts, and you gradually acquire a reputation of reliability and credibility. Your confidence in you is allowed not to unceasingly seek the validation of your acts by others, but rather inside you. This interior force enables you to become proactif and to take initiatives. When the others remain undecided, you are able to decide for them. This faculty to decide by you to even will confer a natural leadership you, and you will easily involve those which are less sure them. You are in fact a person of confidence, since you do not give your word nor do not make promises with the light one. You arrive per hour at your return, and keep to your commitments. As you are firm in your opinions and your decisions, the others know that you are reliable, that they can be pressed on to trust you and you. The other consequence, it is that your words are listened to, since it is known that you do not speak in the air. It is thus easier to you to make take into account your opinion.
2. Improve your visibility
I already met people who were phantom truths. Although having spent a few minutes in their company, I was hardly able to remind me their face. They were absolutely transparent, did not leave any trace in the spirit of those which they crossed, and it is hardly if they were noticed. At very rare people, that became almost supernatural about it. They came, set out again, and nobody had even noticed them. I acknowledge that this type of competences can sometimes be useful (as in class, when the teacher seeks somebody to go in the table), but it is not what interests us here.
If you want charisma, you will need relational ease, and especially of the presence. You cannot remain in a corner by hoping for that your interior beauty will be noticed, that will not walk. Show! It is necessary that it is noticed you, that you are visible. In the evenings, there are that which observe, and that which is observed. Thus become that there. While becoming more visible, you will mark the spirits on several levels. Let us suppose that you make watch of a great visibility during one evening or you do not know everyone. Initially, it will be easier to you to tie new relations: people seek the company of those which have a great ease social Ensued, when people reconsider with this evening, they will also reconsider with you. You will thus have marked their memory, it is not brilliant, that?! How to increase your visibility? It is not so complicated, believe me. Do not hesitate to use all the directions at your disposal. To show to you, be dynamic, move, have the sure air of you, and adopt a vestimentary style which is clean for you. Make things, are that which dances like God, or made magic. To be heard, speak high, and even speak very short. Take active share with a conversation, and do not be afraid to speak. Launch subjects, tell interesting things, amusing anecdotes, develop telling some your exploits (but made in a subtle way, not to pass for large heavy). Do not hesitate to use a strong voice, to be heard (always without misusing it, of course). Do not neglect the kinesthetic feelings, touch people on the back, the shoulder, the hand, the arm, etc. A simple contact by-Ci by-there will make miracles, in particular as regards seduction. Do not forget that the body contacts are powerful trés signals. Use advisedly. To make you feel, you could perhaps use a light perfume? And for the taste…. Good, there, I leave it to you to find ideas Some relatively simple techniques will enable you to increase your visibility in an impressive way. Start by being really present. Cease planning, go down again on ground, and are so that you make. Concentrate on the conversation in progress, focus at the time present. If you float, people will perseverant themselves some, and if you give the air not to interest you, you will not interest. Involve to be called people by their name, you will mark their spirit and their memory. It is a method which costs only one small effort of memory, and which gives spectaculars results. Moreover, to retain the name of a person will force you to concentrate you and to interest you in it. Yours sincerely develop a vestimentary style. That does not mean that it is necessary to become a fashion victim, but you must become aware that your appearance conveys a message, and that people form an opinion about you in 30 seconds. You there can nothing, then accept it, and take time to look after your appearance. Work your visual contact, until obtaining a frank and friendly glance. Do not be afraid to look at people in the eyes (without fixing them at the point to badly put them at ease). A reducing glance is the best means to become invisible. To increase your visibility will have another effect: you will be subjected to a stronger social pressure, i.e. that you will undoubtedly become the target of comments, and will be more often judged that others. Remain trustful! If you show that you are at ease with that, you will prove that you are accustomed to being looked at, and your charisma will go up out of arrow.
3. Interest in the others
This point important, and too often is very neglected. Even if you manage to develop all the other points quoted here, if you forget to sincerely interest you in the others, you perhaps maintain the illusion a few minutes, but you finish by being catalogued like the ball of service. I already discussed with people who were perfectly at ease in company, had things interesting to tell, but which did not ask me the least small question to know which I was, which I made, which were my projects, my passions, etc. In short! Who were not interested in me. Know which effect that was done to me? And well, a fundamentally unpleasant effect. I tested a faintness, almost resentment with respect to these people if egoists. At first sight, they appeared very pleasant, but the more time passed, plus my faintness grew. My only desire was to take the broad one, and my only activity, in this social relation, was restricted to seek a pretext to leave. I also met people who had an immense talent to show at which point they were gifted. By crossing them, I said “Wow! This person is intelligent/qualified/gifted/etc!” But these people especially left me a bitter taste in the mouth, and at all the desire for passing from time with them. On the other hand, I already crossed some charismatic people, and their talent was very different: with them, I felt intelligent/qualified/gifted/etc In fact, it was incredible to note at which point their contact was pleasant, because they returned me what there was the best in me. It was absolutely not flattery, nor of kindness. Simply, they noticed my greater qualities, and mentioned subtly which point they their liked. Thus let us recapitulate. The first point, it is to be interested sincerely in the others. Accept the others such as they are, with their qualities and their defects, and will know that everyone with something of interesting to tell. People are interesting. If you do not feel interested, it of your fault, is then done an effort. Be sincerely curious. Put questions about the life of the others, their passions, their projects, their dreams, their activities, their trade, their family, their states of hearts. It is very important to practice an active listening: be attentive and sympathizing. Even if the conversation seems to be only one exchange of banalities, made the effort retain the principal contents of it. If somebody explains you an aspect of his trade, it is not so that you forget it at the end of a few minutes. If it you ask to somebody if it is married, or if it has children, you will have to remember it to ask for news of its family to him the next time that you will meet it Then, you must make so that people smell themselves well with you. That they feel important with your contact. It is a rare competence, I met it only at one handle of anybody during my life. It claims much subtlety, and is difficult to acquire, but the effects are striking. In fact, it is neither more nor less than one special manner to make compliments. How to be caught there? It will be the subject of a forthcoming detailed article.
4. Be visionary
Already tried to speak in public on a subject which you do not control? Were the results undoubtedly rather disappointing, not? But already spoke about your greater passion? Of something which was really important for you? Of a subject which you do control on the end of the fingers, of which you know the least details? Of a subject which packed you, which exaltation you, transported you? I will bet that the reactions were better. Passion can transform no matter whom into Cyrano, developing its subject with a miserliness such as it is impossible not to be packed. At the time of a conference, the most interesting speaker is always that which is interested by that about which it speaks. That is known, because that feels.
That you devises on the stamps, your collection of insects or your holidays with the ski, since your subject really impassions you, you will manage to involve your audience. An impassioned speaker communicates an incredible life about it, and releases a powerful energy which radiates around him.
Passion is an excellent means of booster rocket its charisma, because it confers power, it is able to transform a timid person into exciting interlocutor. That which is impassioned, because it is very interested, takes all the appearance of somebody of interesting, and this is why it is able to attract crowd. But more than passion, it is the vision which confers the most charisma. Think of the politicians who haranguing crowd by promising a better world. These are the impassioned visions and their faculty them to divide which gave such an amount of to be able to Gandhi and Bill Gates which, at the base, were common altogether men.
Relational ease, the personality, and even the charisma are only means. But the vision is an end. Means without ends do not carry out nowhere, and to develop its charisma without having vision, it is a little like leaving the Bertha Gross to kill a mite. You would be surely surprised to know the real number people who have long-term plans (more than 1 or 2 years). That does not make much. People are attracted not the visionaries, because they give a direction to their existence. They saves the sorrow to them to conceive their own projects, and their provide goals in the life. If you have projects, that you are ready to divide them, and can “sell them”, if you are able to call upon imaginary people to predict to them what they wish more, you hold on them a fabulous capacity, and the effects for your charisma are extraordinary. You will become a leader, somebody whom one has desire for following, that one listens to, and that one admires.
The charisma, it is a mixture of all that
To hold charisma, one needs a mixture of all these elements. If you rely on you but that you are not interested in the others, or if you have a vision but are unable to communicate, you will not become charismatic. You want to become that which one admires, that one listens to, that one respects, and which one seeks the company? And well, with the job!